The Child of Artemis
by DancingWafflesWaddles
Summary: Dipper and Mabel Pines find out something shocking about their family's past. Soon the two are shipped off to New York. Both wanting adventure like Gravity Falls, they get a little more than they asked for. The story that was erased by the gods has now been uncovered and involves the combining of two different worlds, both buried in secrets. Read and review!
1. This Is Not Logical

**Prologue**

Winter Break, 2012

Mabel had been sobbing into her pillow for at least a week. Me? I wasn't doing much better. I had tried to stay strong, but that's had to do when you realize your family and life is a lie. And why right now? We were all going to go on a vacation to New York for the holidays, but we overheard them talking to each other last Friday.

Mabel was pestering me so I walked with her the their room and was about to walk in until, "Honey, it's alright. Mabel and Dipper will never find out they were adopted." Did my dad just say that? Mabel's eyes widened and she gasped. I clamped a hand over her mouth and led her back to her bed. She started sobbing, and my eyes getting teary. Sure I was exhausted, but it's hard to sleep when you find out your parents weren't your real parents.


	2. Parents: You Can't Always Trust Them

Mabel and I had agreed: spend winter break with our parents and then confront them once we got back to California. Somehow, she'd managed to keep crying without being caught by our parents. Recently, Wendy's been writing letters to us about how super scary things have been happening at Gravity Falls, and everyone is noticing it. That's extremely weird and creepy, and my parents said that Gravity Falls isn't good to be around at this time of year. I don't know what they're deal is, but I didn't even know I was adopted.

After security and all of that airport stuff, Mabel and I were doing rock, paper, scissors to determine who got the window seat. And because I have rotten luck, she won. To my left, my parents were just staring at us, looking extremely nervous. It was difficult to think happy thought when your so-called parents are sweating like hippos. "Hey Dipper, can we talk to you?" my dad asks when Mabel is doing her victory dance. I nod and walk five steps away from Mabel.

"During security, the officials told us that our tickets weren't purchased, but you two can still go," my mom sputters out. I look at her as if she suggested we run over our grandma. "Wh-hat? This was a family vacation!" I yell a little loud and attract the attention of nearby passengers. "I'm sorry Dipper, but we just called a friend of ours that is going to pick you up at the airport there. His name is Mr. Brunner. He was one of my teachers in college," my dad explains. So that's it? They save all of this money planning things and now, Mabel and I were going alone? I breathe in and out and don't even hug or say bye to my parents. They call for flight 218, and I grab my carry on and Mabel's hand. She waves bye to our parents, probably thinking that we were on first class and they had to wait for economy. We sit down and Mabel started playing with the barf bags.

"My bag just barfed all over you, Dipper!" Mabel laughs. I take a deep breath and explain about how the tickets got mixed up and how we weren't going to be with our parents as quickly as possible. Mabel starts laughing as says, "I see what you did there! You're trying to trick me, aren't you?" I put on a super serious face and tell her again. She just sits there and stares out the window.

Mabel hasn't moved for six hours- she has been sitting in the same position for six hours! No food, water, bathroom break, sleep, nothing! When the plane lands, she comes out of her state of shock and becomes all happy again. She never ceases to surprise me.

After we get our luggage, I scan the pick up area. There. A man in a wheelchair is sitting nearby holding a sign with our names on it. How is her going to drive us wherever we're going? Mabel and I slowly walk over to Mr. Brunner.

"So you must be the children that Leo was talking about," he greets us. Leo? That was my dad's nickname- only a few close friends new it. Just like mine. Leo was the constellation stuck on my dad's forearm. It looked like a tattoo, but it was a birthmark. I nod and introduce ourselves.

"Hi. I'm Dipper and this is Mabel. My parent told me you were going to pick us up," I explain. He looks confused and replies with, "Your parents? Oh yes, your situation is much different than most of the campers." Campers? Where are we going? He calls a man over- I can't catch his name- and the guy grabs our bags. It may be my imagination, but the guy either has shimmery tattoos or a bunch of eyeballs. It's hard to tell. Mabel begins talking to Mr. Brunner about unicorns and sweaters and how she misses her pet pig, Waddles. I didn't want Mr. Brunner to get a bad impression of us, but he was liking Mabel fine. We got into the back of a strawberry truck and the tattooed guy took off.

Although New York is known for its traffic, the truck just seemed to fly over the cars. Literally fly over. Mabel was laughing, for some unknown reason. Soon, we were looking at the Atlantic Ocean. Why were we leaving the city? No one said anything the entire ride until we stopped at a farm. Farm? We were in New York! Why stop at a farm?

"I'm surprised you're both still alive," Mr. Brunner comments. Well sure, we were attacked by things in Gravity Falls, but how does he know about that? Without hesitation, Mabel skips up a hill to a single tree. "Woah, Dipper! Check this out!" she gestures. I reluctantly follow but then look at Mr. Brunner for an explanation.

"Dipper and Mabel Pines, welcome to Camp Half-Blood."


	3. Deer Hate Me

"Ooooh! This place is AWESOME!" Mabel runs around in circles, giggling. She's almost too positive at times. I look back for our suitcases, but the driver guy disappeared. I look to my right to ask Mr. Brunner something, but there's not a crippled man sitting next to me. I see half of a white stallion. Mabel sees him and shouts, "Ohmygod! You're a pony! Smile Dip CAN tell the future!" See, this is what I mean by never seeing the creepy or weird part of things. "Yes Mabel, I am a centaur- half man, half horse," he says. I'm probably sputtering like an idiot, but I kind of say, "What the... Who are you?" "Dipper, I am Chiron, the camp activities director," he says as if nothing strange is going on. Chiron? Isn't that from- "Greek mythology? Yes," he just read my mind, and I'm starting to freak out.

"Geek mythology? What's that?" Mabel asks.

"Greek mythology, Mabel. The myths about gods and why science is what it is," I say.

"Well Dipper, do you think I'm a myth?" Chiron asks. I'm afraid that I'll say something stupid and get electrocuted or something. "No, you're standing in front of me right now."

Chiron leads us to a dining pavilion, I guess. There are not that many other kids there, about 7. He gestures us to sit with a girl sitting alone. I hesitantly sit down, considering I don't know where I am. She stares at me with intense, gray eyes. She's about my age, twelve, but I look like some cartoon standing next to her. Mabel smiles and plops down next to her. I try to give her a warning look, but once she opens her mouth, she has to say at least a few sentences before stopping.

"Hi! I'm Mabel, and that nerd over there is my brother. We're supposed to be vacationing with our parents, but this is way cooler," she just has to blurt out. Although the blonde grey eyes girl looked like she wanted to fight me, she smiled at Mabel. I hate how Mabel is so likable, while I'm just plain awkward.

"Hey. I'm Annabeth Chase. Usually camp is more crowded, but most of them aren't year rounders," Mabel and I both give her confused looks. She starts explaining about how one of our parents are a god... Wait, god? "But, we have two parents," I explain. "Did they ever tell you that you were adopted?" Annabeth questions. All I could manage was a nod. I would tell you about all of the notes I took about monsters and gods and that awesome stuff, but as Mabel would say, I bore people with that. Mabel's version would probably be like, "Maybe we can befriend the monsters and have a party to celebrate! Wouldn't it be cool if they made Waddles a god?" She doesn't really understand the concept of Greek mythology. You're probably thinking, _Why is Dipper accepting all of this weirdness so easily? _I had to spend and entire summer in Gravity Falls, so monsters are not a big surprise. What I'm surprised about is that we have a god for a parent. Wait, if only one of my parents was a god, who's my other one?

As soon as Annabeth shows us how to conjure food and drinks up, she tells us that we must put some offerings in the fire for the gods. Even after ten minutes of sitting with her, you can tell she's a born leader. I stood up and followed her to the fire. She scooped up some of her food and prayed. I followed. _Mom or Dad, wherever you are, I will make you proud, somehow. Then you won't be embarrassed that Dipper Pines, nerdy little geek, was your son. _The fire glows brightly, and I take this as a good sign. But then an abnormally large creature darts from the forest and tramples me. When I sit up, Chiron, my sister, Annabeth, and the other few campers are surrounding me. My vision's fuzzy and my entire body aches.

"Chiron, that was a deer. The animal sacred to Artemis," Annabeth states with a worried expression. Mabel says, "Oooh! That animal was totally like the cutest thing ever! Well, besides Waddles." Everyone stares at her, but I can't blame them. Someone shoves a type of food or medicine into my mouth. It tastes like the cookies Grunkle Stan steals from the neighbors that live a few minutes away. Those cookies were awesome. My body begins to feel better, although the bruises are still visible.

"Why would Artemis send a deer to stampede you?" Annabeth wants an answer, but what am I supposed to know? Chiron says that the campfire is cancelled and that everyone should report to their cabins immediately. Annabeth sends Mabel and me off to this guy that calls himself Luke. He would've made Robbie jealous- an athletic, good-looking, and overall positive nineteen year old. He explains a little more about the godly parents, and when I ask him how his relationship with his father, Hermes, is going, his face darkens to an almost evil glare. He shrugs it off and continues as if nothing had happpened. This place was just like Gravity Falls. Mabel is just randomly playing on and iPad she found under one of the beds. She's also writing a proposal on how to make the camp better: put pigs in it, sparkle everything, and other things only Mabel could think of. Just then, her body begins glowing pink. "Whoa, Dipper! Maybe I can bedazzle myself again and become a disco ball!" Luke's eyes widen and he yells for Chiron, who is trotting around, making sure everyone in in their cabins. By the time he comes, Mabel isn't glowing as bright.

"The blessing of Aphrodite? Why right now?" he looks into the ceiling. "Why hasn't her hair and clothes changed?" Luke asks. I guess that whenever a child of Aphrodite was claimed, they got a full makeover, but Mabel's sweaters seemed pretty sparkly to Aphrodite, apparently. I got angry. Why would she claim Mabel, and not me? I mean, we are twins! _It may not be what you think._ a voice whispers into my head. Geez, are gods going to just barge into my mind now? Mabel gets moved to the Aphrodite Cabin, leaving me with Luke. "Luke,who do you think my parent is?" Luke stares at me and replies with, "Well, we don't even know your other parent, so it could be either a god or godess. I really don't know. It doesn't make any sense why Aphrodite would claim your sister and not you." He tells me that I should get some rest. Apparently, he's right because I fell asleep right when my head landed on the pillow.

_I know you wish to learn your family's past, but I will warn you, you will have a terrible fate if you know. _

_Aphrodite? _

_No young boy, it's Artemis. Sorry about the deer. This is what I've been trying to avoid for the past few centuries, but now your future unfolds._

_A wave of confusion rolls over me. What am I doing?_

_Dipper, you may know that I swore to never have any affairs with men. _

_Yes..._

_Well, you will learn more about your parents now..._

_The scene flashes into an apartment kitchen. A confident man is sitting there, holding hands with a lady. Right off the bat, I can tell it's Artemis. "I do have feelings for you, but you will have a terrible fate if you say those three words," she softly whispers. "How about you? I wasn't the one that took an oath," the man says. They share a conversation through probably talking through their minds. _

_"I love you," the man confesses and thunder instantly booms outside. Artemis pleads, "Please, Fates! I do have feelings for him, and I know you with torture him, but let the child live!" I'm officially confused. What does this have to do with me?_

_I hear a powerful voice shake, "Artemis, you have broken the oath to the River Styx. The mortal shall serve a terrible fate." The man seems frozen, unable to do anything. Artemis hugs him, and he flashes in a golden light. The storm has ceased, but Artemis is weeping. "This is why Hunters don't fall in love," she says to herself, "They become distracted and forget what's really important." Suddenly, a deer gallops into the room. Man, I am sick of deer. A small cry comes from the bundle of blanket on its back. I move closer behind Artemis and glance at whatever is on its back. My breath stops. It's a baby. With large eyes and an unusual birthmark. Of the Big Dipper. I flash of light blinds me._

_Now you know. You may never speak of this, not even to your "sister" Mabel. _

_Wait, Mabel's not my sister? I'm suddenly feeling as is the entire world is crushing me._

_I will tell you more of that later, but for now, you have never been speaking to me. No excuses. I have to go before Zeus notices my absence, but I have made a deal with someone to help guide you along your soon to be tragic life. _

_Well... Thank you. I will not let you down... uh, Mother._

_DON'T CALL ME THAT! Now leave before I kill you in your sleep._

I sit up abruptly and look around. Luke is across the room, sleeping in a bed. My forehead's sweaty and I'm really thirsty. Man, is this going to happen every time I go to sleep from now on? I'm trying to think about what Artemis said about the whole arrangement of me being claimed by someone else. What is that called, God Adoption Center? My head suddenly hurts. I guess I'm not even supposed to think about that. I figure that I won't be able to sleep anymore so I turn on the nearby lamp and read for a few hours before the sun comes up.


	4. Bedazzling Toilet Paper

Something's been up with Dipper. Well, he's still himself, just more of a nerd and serious. I think he's avoiding me. Well, I'm sorry if I got caught up with the Aphrodite Cabin. It's AWESOME! There are no other people here right now, but I'm not arguing. I think that my siblings will congratulate me when they see the total glitter makeover I just gave the cabin. Speaking of siblings, why hasn't Aphrodite claimed him? I wouldn't blame her- there are many reasons why Dipper is embarrassing. But he's still cool and fun, I guess.

When I wake up, Waddles is snoring on my bed. Ohmygod! I can tell it's him. The adorable cheeks, the cute little snout, it's Waddles! He opens his eyes and oinks, _Mabel!_

I hug him over and over again. I'll admit, I was getting lonely being all by myself. Dipper and I always had to share a room, so I was thrilled when I walked into an empty cabin. But after one night, it was terrific to have a new roommate.

"I found him up in the hill, so I called me of the satyrs over. They told me that it said, 'I'm Waddles. Mabel is my BFF. I went first class In someone's luggage. They probably were not expecting a pig to jump out during security, but here I am!' I allowed it to come and stay with you." I tackled Chiron in a hug, but that's hard to do when he's half pony. I don't think any if the campers hug him because he trips over his back feet. Oops.

Chiron tells me to get ready for breakfast and leaves to check up on everyone else. I put on a sweater that appeared on my bed this morning. The card on it said, "To my stylish daughter, Mabel. Love, Aphrodite." It was soooo cute with sparkles and the cutest pony with wings ever! A Pegasus, I think that's what Dipper calls it. I pose in the pink sweater for Waddles, and he oinks in approval. I skip with him to breakfast.

I'm skipping past the rest of the cabins. Luke and Dipper wave and join me to walk to the nice smell of bacon. Waddles oinks uncomfortably and I apologize. Dipper still looks a little upset about not being claimed, but he should be glad and enjoy the freedom of not knowing what god was your parent. "Just don't accidentally insult them," I warn. Dipper just nods and stares, probably thinking of random lists he could make later. As I said, Dipper has an annoying obsession over lists.

Luke asks me how I like having the cabin to myself. "OOOOH! I bedazzled the bathroom and unrolled the toilet paper so I could draw pictures and then rerolled it!" Luke and Dipper both look at me kind of funny. I think that they're impressed, but they just pretend to be weirded out. Dipper does a weak laugh and I skip ahead of them, spotting Annabeth.

As I walk up to her, I can tell that she was eyeing Luke. Or Dipper. No, it was Luke. "Does someone have a crush?" I try to wiggle my eyebrows but it just doesn't seem to work out for me. She first looks like she wants to hurt me, but she just sighs. "He's been my only real family since Thalia left me." I just nod, but I'm totally lost. "When I was seven, I ran away from home. Luke and Thalia found me and promised I would always be family. When we were at Half-Blood Hill, Thalia was changed into a tree by her father as she protected Luke and me." Tears form at the corners of her eyes. Wow, I bet you'd have to be good friends with Annabeth before she could tell you that. I open my arms for a hug, and she hugs me as a friend, not an awkward sibling. I can tell she does have feelings for him, but like a big brother that is seven years older than her. I never had someone to look up to. Just my brother, and because we're twins, we even ourselves out with his nerdness and my awesomeness.

Annabeth tells me that because it's winter and there are barely any camprs, Chiron convinced Mr. D to allow everyone to sit at the same table. Who the heck is Mr. D? Does that stand for Mr. Doodlekinz? That would be an awesome name. Mabel Doodlekinz. Yep, that's the best name ever. Waddles joins Chiron at another table. Aw, animals mingling. So adorable.

A boy sittng across from us says hi to me. "I'm Kyle Kim, one of Annabeth's half-brothers." Apart from his gray eyes, he looked nothing like her. He was probably thirteen with dark hair, pale skin, and he looked like he hasn't eating in days. His tee shirt just shows bone underneath: no muscle, no fat. Weird. He reminds me of Dipper, who has noodle arms, but Kyle just gathers up every single plate, which is twenty, and brings them into the kitchen. I meet other people, a funny girl named Clarisse who said sparkles were for baby unicorns (I LOVE baby unicorns!), Travis and Connor Stoll, both sons of Hermes (they had to sleep in the Big House so Chiron could surveillance them last night after Chiron woke up with shaving cream all over his face the previous night), and a few others. This place was awesome. Unfortunately, Dipper wasn't looking on the bright side of things a lot of the time.


	5. Did I Mention That I Love Pigs?

Why was it so hard for Dipper to make friends? Well sure, he does use boring words like banter. Chiron seems like a teacher type of dude, but he must have been more open than Dipper.

After breakfast, Chiron introduces Dipper and me to the camp director. Remember? Mr. Doodlekinz? Well it turns out that it's actually Dionysus, but that's still a pretty rocking name. He stares at both of us funnily, but Dipper bows awkwardly as I start talking about me and how I got here.

"Mabel? Oh, that is a name that is hard to forget, but I'll try my hardest. And Dipper? Why that pety human constellation is made up of the guts of a woman that fell in love with Zeus and was cursed by Hera. Good times," he reminds me of a big version of Pacifica, but I'll have to show him my bedazzler anyways. It would go great with his leopard pants.

Once I bring this to his attention, his eyes bright up. "The bedazzler? That's one of the only human inventions that I'm impressed with. I look foward to that," he smiles and I skips out happily, leaving Annabeth staring in awe as I grab Dipper's arm. See? I'm quite likable.

Annabeth catches up to us. "Wha- How- He-," she stutters. "Even before I was claimed, I have a natural talent for knowing what a person likes and hates. Let's see... Annabeth, you dream of being a hero with Luke, you hate spiders, and you often keep yourself awake at night trying to read, even if you have dyslexia," I magically say. Wow, I don't even know what dyslexia is! Annabeth and Dipper both stare at me. I shrug and walk to our first class, dueling. Luke was waiting there with the rest of the campers. It was a small class of about 9 people.

"Dipper, Mabel, you two don't have a weapon yet so Beckendorf will take you to the camp forge to be fitted," Luke gestures a boy over to us. He's probably like twelve, but he has three times more muscle than Dipper. "Hey. I'm Beckendorf, one of Hephaestus' sons," he boy smiles. Dipper looks afraid of him.

Once at the forges, I get sweaty. It's so hot! Beckendorf pulls a chest from under a workbench and lays out a bunch of shiny and pointy things. "Mabel, I think you're more of a sword type of lady. Try this celestial bronze sword," he hands me a long one, about my arm length. I'm guessing it's lighter than I thought it would be, because I almost chopped Beckendorf's head off. "Perfect," I announce. Dipper and Beckendorf look like it was a bad decision to hand me a weapon, but I'm alright. Written on the handle is χοίρος, which means pig. Beckendorf notices and states, "One of Ares' sons long ago made this sword. His father thought that he was trying to upstage him and turned him into a pig. Specifically, the Erymanthian Boar, which is now sacred to the god, Pan," Weird story, but I love pigs. Dipper adds on, "I think Hercules captured it." Beckendorf explains how monsters are never dead, and they can reform. I wish I could reform whenever I was killed.

He digs around until he finds what probably is the lightest weapon in the box, a scrawny knife. Dipper says, "Maybe something bigger?" Beckendorf looks worried but shrugs and exchanges it with a knife slightly shorter than my sword. "Huh, I think this is from the cyclops' forges in Poseidon's palace in the sea. Made during the war with the titans. You'd be best with a short range weapon. I figured that you are good at planning and making lists, but remember, all demigods have ADHD or dyslexia," Beckendorf warns. Dipper replies with sweat rolling down his forehead. We walk with Beckendorf back to the arena.

Luke is helping one of the campers while others are slicing away at straw dummies. He pairs people up and comes over to us. "Mabel, you might want to point the sword AWAY from you," he suggests. I quickly flip it, nearly taking out Luke's head. My bad. If he hadn't deflected it, we would have a Luke kabob. I apologize and Luke goes help Dipper. Somehow, my body takes over. One off the Ares kids charge behind me, but I manage to slice their messy hair into a buzz cut. Luke looks at me the same way when I told him about sparkling the toilet paper.


	6. The God of Terrible Poetry

"Sorry about that," I apologize to Luke after I watch Mabel nearly behead him. "It's okay. Let's see, a nice celestial bronze knife. Grab the hilt right there and point the tip to the chest. I aim at the straw dummy and glance at Luke. "Be careful. You must formulate a plan so the opponent can't counter-strike so easily." I nod and smile. Mabel always lot tells me my plans are why I failed with Wendy. I could pull this off. Luke tries to take me by surprise, but while he thought I was daydreaming, I was solving the probability of Luke trying to take me by surprise. It was an 87% chance. Luke looked at me, and I told him about my probability thing. "Being a nerd is better than being a cool jock in the demigod world." I blush, but hey, I am a nerd. Luke tells me that they haven't had a demigod in a long time that nearly doesn't have dyslexia. Luke yells, "Class dismissed!" and everyone worms out of the arena. Mabel goes off to Annabeth, probably to ramble on about her sword. "Dipper, how did you already have some combat skill?" Luke sits down next to me. "Well, last summer our parents shipped us off to Gravity Falls, Oregon. There were a bunch of creepy things like evil wax sculptures and gnome armies. I trained myself when I had nothing to do." Luke stares off into space, but he shakes his head. "Oh, that's a big advantage." I say bye and leave him to think.

"Dipper! Chiron wants you to come to the meeting of the cabin counselors!" Annabeth runs up to me. I just nod and try to keep up with her. I walk into the room, and almost everyone is sitting around the ping pong table. "Annabeth, tell us the dream you had that might call for a new quest," Chiron silences everyone. Everyone is murmuring, so I guess there hasn't been a quest in a while.

"Lord Apollo has spoke to me, not using the Oracle. Apparently, he couldn't make the Oracle recite a limerick, but I remember what he told me:

_This is a quest for the handsome me_

_I would do it but I'm too lazy_

_I must fix my hair_

_So speak to me then_

_And find the sun at the large pine tree._

So I realized two things: Apollo forgot how to rhyme, and he has a quest. It's probably a minor one, but you never ignore a god's orders," Annabeth eyes Chiron as if she's been bugging him about this. Chiron sighs and says, "Alright Annabeth. Everyone will meet at Half Blood Hill ten minutes before dinner. And I agree, the Oracle would have made a more sensible limerick, even though she's decaying." Everyone else nods and begins filing out.

Mabel finishes her can of sparkly cheese (I'm guessing the kitchen harpies liked her) and burps. "Dipper! We get to see another god!" Mabel twirls around. Personally, I didn't want anything to do with the gods, but I'm stuck with it. Mabel stops twirling and turns green. "Chiron!" she gags before she vomits. "Blarrrrrf!" Wait, that isn't what barfing sounds like. I open my eyes and see an upset centaur covered in pink silly string. Classic Mabel. Chiron tells us he needs to wash up and escorts us outside. I spot Annabeth mumbling to herself by the side of the Big House. I shush Mabel and tip toe over to Annabeth. "Hey Annabeth! Dipper's trying to spy on you!" Mabel shouts, giggling. Annabeth turns around and tackles me to the ground. Curse my noodle arms. "What. Are. You. Doing. HERE!" she yells. "Annabeth, we were also walking out of the Big House," my throat is starting to close. She takes a deep breath and pulls me up. "Sorry, it's just that, well, there's this other huge prophecy about a kid that should never have been born, and well..." she stops talking. Mabel changes the subject by saying, "Annabeth, who's Apollo? The cool ice skater dude?" "No Mabel, the god of poetry, prophecy, the sun, some other things," I correct her. Although by Annabeth's dream, I'm questioning the first two.

"I've never met him, but Mr. D says he's a player," Annabeth comments. Mr. D gossips? Weird. "Well, now that I know who he is, he enjoys ladies, hates being forbidden from the Hunters, and his 8:27 is different because he's a god," Mabel blurts out. Does she even know who the Hunters are? Judging by her confused face, I guess not.


	7. The Haiku that Plans my Death

I quickly say goodbye to Dipper and Mabel. As I walk to the Athena Cabin, I think out loud, "Could Dipper be the child of one of the Big Three?" It seems unlikely- I had always pictured the child of the prophecy to be more, well, like Luke. Athletic, well trained, smart, determined. Sure Dipper was impressive for a new camper, but still. Mabel seemed like a better fit. I have never met anyone in five years able to do what she does. I searched through all of my books: nothing on evaluating of enemies. Her ability did make me jealous. Sure, I had just gotten an invisibility cap for my birthday a few weeks ago, but Mabel could tell what your worst fear was in the blink of an eye.

Most of the summer campers had packed everything, but I often look at their writings and notes they had left behind. It wasn't much, but they got to go out and explore the world. The twins hadn't ever run away, even if they had fake parents. They were better than mine. No, not you, Athena. My stepmom.

I spend the next hour staring out the door, waving to passing campers. "Hey Annabeth. I'm glad you're being given a quest. You know, after my epic fail," Luke walks over. "Luke, do you think I'm ready for a quest?" I ask him. "Annabeth, for the five years I have known you, you are the bravest fighter I've ever met," he says sincerely. Besides Chiron, he's been my closest family since I ran away. Well, more than Chiron too. "Thanks Luke," I glance at the clock: 5:45. I try to keep up with him as we race to Thalia's tree.

Nearly everyone is surrounding the tree, all staring at the sun. After a few silent moments, Travis goes, "Is it just me or is the sun getting big-" "DUCK!" Chiron yells as a massive fire ball barely misses our heads. We shield our eyes as a glow becomes hotter and hotter.

"'Sup people? Sorry, I had to comb my hair," I look up and see a cocky blonde guy standing in front of us. I was just about to snap back, but I remembered he was a god, no matter how egocentric or cocky.

"Lord Apollo," everyone bows their heads. "So, these are the few little people that stay year round? And hello, Mabel and Dipper Pines." Mabel is staring at them, probably because he's so sparkly and glittery. Dipper just stands there awkwardly. "Well Chiron, I need some of you to do me a personal favor. One of my enemies, King Midas, was turned into a half donkey by me. Lately, I've been having weird cravings for straw. Even though I'm a god, I never eat straw. I'm more stubborn than usual." Someone says, "No you're not." And Apollo yells, "Yes I am! Sorry. Anyways, I'm guessing that when I cursed the king, I slightly cursed myself. I don't know how, but as the god of medicine, I do know that in twelve days, I will permanently become a donkey. No more awesome a hair or great poetry." I mumble, "I wouldn't mind quiet Apollo." But he's a god, and he can torture us for the twelve days when he still has powers.

I've never heard of a curse rebounding except for Harry Potter, but he's not Greek. "And because I'm here, I get to choose who goes to Gravity Falls." Dippers eyes widen. Isn't that where he said he trained? "Let's see... Annabeth, Mabel, Dipper, Luke, and Travis." This is one of the weirdest choices he could have said, but I going! Travis is smiling, Mabel is high fiving Luke, and Dipper is staring at the ground. "And you know about the sacred rule where only three survive? Well, I'll change that and make sure at least four are sane when they die." How reassuring.

"The prophecy shall be in a haiku! Ready?

Find Gravity Falls

Cure these cursed donkey hormones

Before I kill you

Whoa! I did it!" Apollo cheers before he flies off with his car.

"Time for dinner!" Chiron announces, but I'm in no mood to eat.


	8. Travis Smuggles 40 Whoopee Cushions

After dinner, I race back to my cabin and lay down, thinking.

"Annabeth, I need help on figuring out what to pack," Dipper cautiously steps into the Athena Cabin. I think about it and reply, "Maybe some clothes... I'll find you and your sister some ambrosia, nectar, and a few drachma." I finish packing everything in my backpack except for my Yankees cap. "Listen Dipper, do you have anything that could help us in Gravity Falls?" "Yeah, I have a book... That's at my house. Darn it! Wait, I might have notes," Dipper pulls out a bunch of papers from under his pine tree cap. "Like Abraham Lincoln," I say out loud.

"Oh, pulling stuff out of your hat? No, Lincoln used it to hide the third hand he had coming out of his head," Dipper nonchalantly replies. Sure I'm startled, but a demigod's life is full of weirdness. "Got it!" Dipper pulls out a stack of scribbles and symbols. He lets me take a look, and it's full of creepy handwriting that's in a language that I've never seen. Gnomes, video games, wax sculptures? Yes, this is beyond weird. "Well, this is not what I was expecting from a quest, but it's nice to have a challenge," I say. I thank Dipper and walk with him to the campfire. I've never gotten to live a normal life, but Dipper seems extremely mature. I hope everyone is like him in the outside world, but that's too much to ask for. All I'm worried about is that Aphrodite will play tricks on my mind and make me fall in love with one of the most sarcastic and oblivious people I will ever meet. Curse love.

"Annabeth? Are you okay?" Dipper's beginning to look worried from me zoning out for a few moments. "Yeah, I was just thinking..." I trail off, hoping to signify I don't want to talk about it anymore. He nods and says, "Thanks for being nice to Mabel and me. It's just that everything is all of a sudden and I feel like I'm being forced into a situation that I'm not ready for." Wow, I've never met anyone brave enough to admit it. Most heroes are like, "Sure it's a big situation, but of course I'll succeed and be honored through stories!" Dipper is real, and so is Mabel. They don't try being what they're not. Sometimes, I admit, I imagine myself surpassing the work of all heroes, making a piece of architecture that will last forever. I wonder what Dipper and Mabel's fatal flaws are. I assume that Dipper would be most likely killed in a situation that involved protecting his sister, and Mabel would most likely be killed by running out of creative ideas on how to deal with monsters. She has already shown me part of the list she's making:

1. Trap them in a jar of mayonnaise.

2. Teach them how to dougie. They'll never get tired of it.

3. Find a way to convince the monster that he's a fairy.

4. Use a time machine to make sure they are killed before they can kill you.

5. Ask Hades to cut you some slack if you forget to duck during a sword fight.

6. Don't worry, pigs outsmart many monsters.

She's creative, but I doubt many of these will ever work.

"Annabeth? We're here," Dipper says as I come back into reality. It's nearly dark and the flames aren't very high. I can tell Chiron is bored as well, because he brings up Apollo's quest. "I have barely heard of Gravity Falls, but Dipper and Mabel spent last summer there, so may we have some background information?"

Mabel begins with, "I won Waddle's at a cheap fair we went to! A creepy kid named Gideon is still after me and my little brother! I met the 8 and half president there! We were nearly killed by a creepy candy monster during Summerween! My brother has a crush on Wendy, a girl that worked with us at my great uncle's store!" Dipper hides his head while everyone, including Chiron, is trying to comprehend every sentence Mabel had just recited. Hmmm, Dipper has a crush? I wish I had never known that...

Chiron decides it's best if we just go instead of sorting out everything here, considering that our lives depend on this. Travis, Luke, and the twins are all ready so Argus drives us to the airport and we board an airplane. Mabel instantly begins crawling around the first class seats, courtesy of Zeus when he's in a good mood. Travis plants some magical whoopee cushions. What makes them magical: the color and scent. Three times the embarrassment!

I'm surprised we haven't been attacked yet, but Mabel had recently spilled a large amount of garlic and watermelon shampoo on us. Everyone complained, but Luke said that it was better than smelling like a monster's lunch. Dipper's doing so many math problems, even though he has ADHD, but not dyslexia. I guess he can't stop doing work while most half bloods can concentrate on stuff like that, including me. "Uh, you guys, we have a 93.6% chance that there is a monster on this plane. I included all of the variables: the amount of people, the speed of the plane, the approximate time, the position of our seats compared to the entire plane, the fact that we had to be shushed because of Travis and Mabel, everything!" Dipper starts working on his will. "What's a variable?" Mabel asks. Travis stops goofing off, "I wish we had a satyr with us or even a cyclopes. They can smell monsters, while this garlic is ruining my reputation with the cute girls across the aisle." I roll my eyes and try to stay alert. That means no sleeping on the plane, or we'll need shifts. "I'll stay up with Dipper. You guys can have some rest," Luke suggests. I nod and relax in the huge chair. Mabel turns herself upside down and falls asleep while Travis messes with unsuspecting flight attendants until I tape him to his seat. I slowly close my eyes and hope that we'll be able to pull this quest off.


	9. I Flirt with a Goddess

Hello ladies and gentlemen, this is your favorite guys ever, Travis! It makes me mad how people always expect the kid whose name is in the title to be the main hero, but for your information, I'm the one that saves the world. Ouch! Annabeth just slapped me.

Anyways, I sit down and try to sleep, but a smile keeps crawling up my face when I think of my awesome handmade whoopee cushions. Connor and I had tried it on Katie Gardner from the Demeter Cabin, and it was hilarious. But at least these mortal passengers don't have dangerous powers that could end up with my hair dyed green for a week. Soon one of the flight attendants on the loudspeaker say, "Excuse me passengers, there is a person placing whoopee cushions in the seats. Please stay seated or watch where you sit. Thank you." I nearly die laughing, if it hadn't been for Annabeth flicking my head. I sarcastically apologize and fall asleep.

Dipper shakes me up. "Hey Travis, that girl was staring and giggling at you. I don't know how girls work, but I think that's a good sign," I thank Dipper and fix up my hair. Annabeth is sleeping, so who's going to stop me?

"Hello, I'm Travis. I'm going with my friends on vacation. How about you?" I smile on the inside, knowing that I nailed it. The thirteen year old looking girl smiles. She has hair the color of a brown squirrel. There's probably a name for that, but I like squirrels. "Hi, I'm Whitney. You can sit next to me." I know, I'm thirteen, but I never get to go out of camp. Since Luke's quest, no one has gotten one until now. Better make the most of it. Connor will be totally jealous, and hopefully the Aphrodite girls will realize that I'm a hero.

"Travis, did anyone tell you that you have a dazzling smile?" Whitney looks into my eyes and I can barely say, "You smell like cinnamon." She says, "My mother sent us two to do something for her in Oregon, but we have no where to stay." She looks really sad and I'll admit it, I'm desperate after I ruined my chances with anyone at camp for tricking all the girls into fighting over whether Connor or I was more annoying. Well, I've never been in a relationship, but I've been spending the past summers trying to get on the girls' good side. "Well, my friends and I are staying at a small town called Gravity Falls. You could stay with us," I offer. She hugs me and now I'm officially in Lala Land. Annabeth wakes up and looks at Dipper, who is staring awkwardly at me. She looks irritated and stomps over to me.

"Travis, what are you doing? We have something important to talk about," she glares. "Annabeth, this is Whitney. I've invited her to stay with us," I say. Annabeth grabs my arm and drags me to my seat. "Travis, you are so thick headed, it's not even funny. She's probably a monster, and we're on a quest," I just nod. Annabeth slaps my face hard. I rub my cheek and Annabeth says, "Ditch her. We might be able to escape, but that means we'll have to lose all of our luggage." I turn around and see her staring at us. Wait, did she just glow?

"Attention all passengers, we will be arriving in Redmond, Oregon in five minutes. Please stow away all tray tables and put all seats in their upright positions," a flight attendant announces. Whitney takes out a letter and if I squint, I can kind of see the writing. The only weird thing is, it's in Ancient Greek. The front of it says, To Harmonia, From Zeus. I shake Mabel up. "Annabeth, Whitney has a letter in Ancient Greek saying To Harmonia, From Zeus. Mabel, who's Harmonia?" Mabel thinks and replies with, "Harmonia, she likes singing, hates violence, and usually talks to her mother from 8 to 9 at night. But I don't know exactly who she is." Annabeth says, "Harmonia. That's a name in Greek Mythology, I just can't remember. Maybe Whitney is a monster that has an alter ego whenever she meets strangers. That's what I do; my fake ID is under the name of Paige Johnson." I can tell she's trying to convince us that Whitney's a monster, but she looks more like a child of Aphrodite. I mean, her eyes, hair, everything!

After we get off of the plane, I introduce Whitney to everyone else. Dipper's twice as awkward, Luke is neutral, and Mabel is talking to her like an old friend. Mabel is such a charismatic girl, but I prefer someone that's shyer than me and doesn't pull awesome pranks. Don't tell anyone this but Mabel had figured out a way to sneak her pig into my backpack and through security, so now my bag smells like Waddles.

As we're waiting for Luke to find a car to rent, Annabeth turns on Whitney. "So Harmonia, just what do you think you're doing here?" Dipper gives her a warning look, but she continues, "Nice manipulating Travis, now how are you going to destroy us?" Whitney stares at Annabeth and replies, "You better respect me, before I do try to destroy you." Annabeth retorts, "And what would you do? Vaporize me?" I try to break up the fight, but Whitney starts glowing. We all shield our eyes until it fades. Replacing the cute girl is an even prettier girl with a white dress and a golden tiara.

"I preach peace, so when I'm violent, a few hundred years of violence is released at once. You better watch your mouth. Becase Annabeth Chase, you never mess with Harmonia, goddess of harmony and concord."


	10. I Learn Why I am a Wimp

I have to admit, Annabeth did lose her temper, but Travis shouldn't be so vulnerable to girls. At least I'm too nervous to talk in the first place. But when a really young girl says she's a goddess, my mind goes into total chaos. I wonder if Artemis ever does that. Ouch, there's that painful sharp feeling in my head again.

Before we had left, I had found a bow and arrow just laying in a shed in the arena, and I was anxious to try it. I mean, archery has to be in my blood, right? So I notch and arrow and shoot, missing the target by ten feet. I repeatedly try over and over, and all of my math equations showed what angle, speed, everything! But I failed miserably.

_You are cursed, foolish boy. _Artemis speaks in my mind.

_Why? Because of your oath_?

_No, I was so ashamed of bearing a child, especially a male, that I cursed you to always miss a target by exactly ten feet, have noodle arms, and nearly incapable of talking to girls._

_Thanks, Lady Artemis._

So it's her fault that I stink at everything besides being a nerd. It still gets to me, but I'm glad Mabel and I are a team. With her skills in machine gun talking and mine in memorizing facts, we're almost unstoppable. But recently things have been changing. I guess that now we're in different cabins, we can't really do anything together. I'll admit, I miss Mabel shooting things in our room with her grappling hook and Waddles constantly biting my foot.

As I'm scanning the area in the first class section, Travis wakes up in front of me. I look across the aisle and see and thirteen year old girl eyeing him. She has light auburn hair and dazzling brown eyes. It takes me by surprise when I realize she looks similar to Mabel, minus the braces and sweater. And how she's staring at Travis.

"Hey, that girl was staring at you. I don't know how girls work, but I think that's a good sign," Travis instantly pops up and walks over to her. I look at Mabel who's snoring and petting Waddles. Annabeth put her invisibility cap on him so the flight attendants don't go mad, but now Mabel looks like she's holding a ball of air. Luke is mesmerized by a Rubix Cube, and his eyes are starting to redden. "Luke, you should go to sleep. Travis is up." Luke thanks me and immediately lays down.

I don't know how, but I sense a powerful force on this plane. Something ancient and Greek. I don't know why I can't figure it out.

So you've been told that later, Whitney is revealed to be Harmonia. When she transforms, my eyes literally popped out of my head. Are all goddesses like this? Over the course of history, women have gotten more rights, but I think that the males of history were stupid to not let ladies control.

I'm shocked about how Annabeth was talking to Whitney even before she revealed herself. But I have to remember, Annabeth hasn't been out of Camp Half Blood for five years. I wish she could've been in Gravity Falls with us, solving mysteries. That would have been awesome.

So we're all trying to comprehend the fact that the girl that was flirting with Travis is a goddess. It's weird, she radiates calmness and aggression at the same time. As if she read my mind, Harmonia says, "My father is Ares, my mother is Aphrodite. So I am a symbol of love and war united. I have come to guide you on your quest for I am a minor goddess therefore I don't have to follow the mountain of rules that apply to the Olympians." We bow our heads, and Annabeth has calmed down. Now I remember! Hamonia's counterpart is Eris, the lady that caused the Judgement of Paris by tossing Athena, Aphrodite, and Hera an apple that said, "For the fairest one." I don't really like Eris, but Harmonia is really nice.

Luke finds a beat up car for only four people, but Harmonia works some of her magic and we're speeding to Gravity Falls in a limousine. Harmonia operates the vehicle with ease, and I hand out blindfolds I've collected over Grunkle Stan's previous car rides. "Uh, are you sure Dipper?" Annabeth questions. "Well, the car trips I've been on with blindfolds are safer in Gravity Falls," I explain. Mabel backs me up with, "And they're funner." I interrupt to tell her that funner isn't a word, but I stop myself. It must be weird, having a group of blindfolded, powerful, and clueless children driving in a car... But hey, Gravity Falls is never not weird (I don't know if that made sense.)


	11. Everyone Has a Secret

**Author's Note: I am going to be putting this story in the POV of Travis, Annabeth, Dipper, and Mabel. Luke is a character that was always difficult to figure out in my opinion, but I might put him in. I was also going to do Gideon, but he's kind of psycho. **

Weird, Dipper just told us to put on blindfolds while we're in a car. I guess Gravity Falls is the definition of weird. In my defense, I only acted like a little jerk to Harmonia. But anyone could be a monster... I'm still suspicious of her. Why would she try to help us? Gods never really interfere with a hero's fate. At least she got us a limo so we can drive to our death in comfort and style. Travis is sitting as close as he can to the driver's seat, staring at Harmonia. Creep. Mabel is feeding Waddle's grape soda, Luke is still messing with the Rubix Cube, and Dipper is still focused on his pile of notes. From the things I've seen in there, I wish we would be battling any type of gods- Greek, Roman, Egyptian, Hawaiian- anything but this! I was never prepared to fight with an army of beavers, defeat a giant corn dog (Dipper doesn't like to talk about that), or meet an army of Manotaurs! One Minotaur might be fine, but a group of hairy bulls that end up fighting each other? This quest is harder than I thought it would be.

After a few more turns and bumps, we stop at a tourist attraction. It says, "Mystery Shack," on the side. The building looks like it would collapse any second. Dipper and Mabel tell us to stay in the limo until they can talk to their great uncle about their surprise visit. Dipper lets me follow with my invisibility cap on.

"Kids, what are you doing here?" an old man says. He has a fez, an undershirt, and stained striped boxers. Classy.

"Hey Grunkle Stan! We're going to spend this week here in Gravity Falls with our new friends, and wanted to know if we could stay here," Dipper says and Grunkle Stan smiles. "Maybe I could make them buy some stuff!" I roll my eyes and follow Mabel outside.

As Dipper is still talking to Stan, we unload the limo. Harmonia announces, "I must go, but I will come to your aid three times during your quest. But you must be willing to trade a portion of your soul; not a lot, maybe a thousandth of your soul, if you have a strong will. If not, you will be consumed by the chaos of my enemy, Eris. So good luck," and with that, we shade our eyes as she becomes her divine form and disappears.

Travis suddenly looks sad. Luke comforts him with, "Dude, she's a freaking goddess; what were you expecting to happen?" True, gods fall in love with people that are like twice as old as Travis... He's so immature. Travis still looks sad, but continues to help bring everything inside and up into a attic. There is no mummified oracle sitting here, but there is a creepy eyes on the window. Judging by the gaping hole in the window opposite of the eye, Mabel was probably having fun with the grappling hook she told me about. There are two beds, some of Mabel's leftover posters, and a giant book on Dipper's bed. It has six fingers and a three on the cover. The book where Dipper got his notes.

A fat guy comes up into the room, panting. "Yo Dipper, who are your friends?" Dipper and Mabel introduce us to Soos. He gives us some sleeping bags Stan stole from a yard sale and we all get ready. We let Dipper take a bed because he apparently gets neck cramps from reading and thinking to himself. Everyone else is alternating Mabel's bed while the rest are sleeping on the floor. It's about one in the afternoon, so we all circle around Dipper's book and think.

"We have well, eleven days to cure Apollo. I think we should go out to town, meet everyone, and see if they have any special powers," Luke says. Dipper adds in, "Mabel and I know just about everyone. There's a kid named Gideon that has an idea of the mysteries here because he had a necklace that could control people and almost killed our uncle in order to win Mabel. There's a jerk named Robbie who I think is a zombie, but I'm not sure. And there's a bunch of others... Everyone in Gravity Falls has a secret."


	12. Robbie Being Helpful? LOL

**By the way, if you enjoy reading this, could you maybe ask friends that are interested in Gravity Falls and Percy Jackson to check it out? I'd really appreciate it. :)**

It's so exciting to be back in Gravity Falls! I can't wait to chill with Candy and Grenda. Dipper says that I get distracted easily, but it never seems like he has faith in me. I look under my bed again. Yep, 827 packs of Gummy Koalas! I'm never going to get sick of those.

Once Dipper and I tell everyone about the people in town, we all get ready to leave. I take off my bunny sweater and slip on a fuzzy, purple smiley face one. When we were getting ready for the quest, I had found a backpack that could magically store any amount of cute items, so I stuffed at least 30 sweaters in it. I also have my sword, and I keep it in a thing that Lazy Susan had knitted for me last summer. Who thought I'd ever need it? She said it was for storing large bananas, but I can easily slide my sword in and out of it. I had asked Aphrodite to make it possible to morph the sword and its cover into a headband, so now I wear my sword wherever I go. I also put 18 packs of Gummy Koalas, a whistle that attracts a pig's attention, and a jug of pink water in my bag. Remember, I can only put cute stuff in my bag, and the bag didn't think that regular water was cute.

Dipper stuffs all of his nerd stuff in his backpack along with his knife and the bracelet that Wendy had dropped when we had the party at the Mystery Shack. I don't know why Dipper hasn't returned that yet, but he often sniffs it as if he can smell her. Creepy. Annabeth gets her cap, knife, ambrosia, and nectar. Travis stuffs a few whoopee cushions along with his firecrackers with Greek fire. He and his brother remind me of Fred and George from Harry Potter. Do you know that even though they're British, wizards use Latin spells? Just some random fact Dipper recited. Luke gets us all ready and we head outside. Dipper trips over himself when we step onto the grass, and I can see why. Wendy's standing there by the Mystery Cart. She is wearing the cute pig shirt I had gotten her for her birthday a few months ago. She sent me a letter in October saying that she and Robbie broke up. I swear, Dipper was all giddy and smiley for a week after that. Apparently, Robbie had left a note saying, "Wendy, I have to go and visit my mom. She's sick, so I'll be out of Gravity Falls for a few months. I miss ya." Wendy was fine with it until she checked his Facebook and saw pictures of him partying with others. She told me the other people looked transparent, but it's too weird for her to comprehend.

"Hey Dipper! Mabel!" she calls and we all run over to her. "Wendy, this is Annabeth, Travis, and Luke," Dipper says. Travis gets all googly-eyed over her. Uh oh, looks like Dipper's got some competition. Annabeth asks, "Wendy, do you know if there's anything bigger than this golf cart that we could use to get into town?" Wendy shrugs and replies with, "Soos has a truck, but you'll need to ask him about that." I smile to Wendy and run after everyone else. Travis leads us to Soos' truck at the front of the shack. The windows were still gone and the doors were dented since we had crashed into the Summerween Superstore a long time ago. I guess Soos didn't have the time to fix it, but people could easily get in. Travis crawls through the window and yells, "Riding shotgun!"

"Dont' we have to wait for Soos?" I ask. Luke and Travis smile those signature smirks of troublemakers, and in a few seconds, the car is up and running. Nevermind. I sit on the left in the back with Annabeth in the middle and Dipper on the right. "Luke, you've barely been outside of camp. Do you know how to drive?" Annabeth asks. Luke just says, "Uh, I'll get the hang of it." He messes with the pedals and steering wheel, and we all put on blindfolds. With each turn, I can feel my food coming up, but Luke runs over a few screaming gnomes and we end up smack in the middle of town. Everyone is being all casual as we remove the blindfolds, not even noticing us. We all walk into the Crate and Barrel factory. Dipper tells me that this is one of the places where Rumble McSkirmish nearly killed Robbie. Cool!

"How are we going to do this? Who knows how long this will take, and we only have a few days!" Dipper starts panicking. I decide to bring something up, "Maybe we could check out Robbie. He left Gravity Falls though, but Wendy told me that the people he's been partying with look transparent." Everyone turns to me, "Why didn't you tell us sooner!?" I shrug.

"Mabel, that means Robbie's been with the spirits of the dead. We've got to find him; he might be the key to completing our quest," Annabeth explains.


	13. Crazy vs Logic

So now I have to go confront my enemy while he's partying with ghosts? Geez. It's bad enough I'm a cursed child trying to cure a god that's half donkey.

Annabeth tells us we have to get to the Underworld in order to find Robbie. I sigh and lean back on a crate, but I fall over when the crate screams. Luke cautiously approaches the box and lifts up the lid. "Hello Mabel and others! I could not help listening to your conversation," Candy pops out. Annabeth, Luke, and Travis look flabbergasted, but Mabel screams and hugs her.

"Candy, what are you doing here?" I ask. She shrugs and replies, "Well since the Summerween Trickster, I've been seeing crazy things. I meant to talk to you people sooner, but you left a few weeks after that. You two know everything about weird, so could you explain all of this weirdo stuff to me? Oh yeah, Grenda is celebrating Christmas at Maine because the holidays here are always a mess." Whoa, Candy barely ever talks.

Annabeth says, "You can see through the Mist. That's an uncommon talent that might have killed you if Gravity Falls wasn't always weird." Candy shows Annabeth a drawing she created while she was in the forest.

"Candy, why is this cyclops so... um... Cute?" Candy giggles and replies to Annabeth saying, "Anime eyes are adorable! The real one was smell and ugly, but I drew a cute picture of it." Mabel high fives her in agreement. Luke says, "If she can see things more clearly than a regular mortal, we might be able to find an entrance to the Underworld here. If we trust her." We all nod and ask Candy if she wants to help. She smiles and tells us about the weird convenience store. The one with the ghosts, Ma and Pa. She says it sometimes glows and she can hear distant shrieks at night. Luke says we should go check it out.

It's almost nighttime, so heading to the store was twice as scary. Last time we went, I guess it was fun and traumatizing at the same time. It was nice to spend time with Wendy, before she was dating Robbie. Luke swerves and gets us to the abandoned store alive.

Dusk 2 Dawn looks exactly the same from when we last came. We all help each other get over the barbed wire. Well, Travis rips a hole in his pants, so I wasn't always the odd one out as Mabel tells me. He gets mad when Candy took a picture to make him "Internet famous." The doors are locked which is weird since we hadn't locked them when we left. I guess Ma and Pa still hated teenagers. I climb up to the vent and crawl inside. The cold air blows over my neck and each creak sounds terrifying. I jump down to the ground and call, "Ma, Pa? It's me, the Lamby Lamby Dance kid. I'm back, and there are two teenagers with me, but they know who they're messing with." I gulp, wondering how long it will take for me to die, but the ghosts appear in front of me.

"Of course you can stay! Just don't mess around doing those teenager things," Pa says and I bow my head. I run to the front doors and smile at my friends. Travis is the first to dash through the doors, but I know what he's up to. "Travis, we can't steal. Unless you want to die in a lamb costume while dancing to some ghosts," I tell him and he quits trying to break the cash register.

"Luke, do you know where we can find an entrance to the Underworld?" Annabeth asks. Luke shrugs and looks at Candy. "Hey Mabel and her friends, I see a glowing light behind the freezer!" I run over and look at the freezer where I screamed when I saw floating eyeballs. It's not glowing, but Candy's usually right. She tugs at the handle. "The door won't open!" she exclaims. Huh, I could open it last summer. "That's because it needs a demigod to touch it," Annabeth explains as she walks over to the door, pulls at it, and fails. "Maybe we could use a battering ram like warriors used to," Mabel suggests. Wow, I didn't even know Mabel remembers the lecture I gave her on the greatest to worst war strategies of all time. Annabeth tells Mabel her idea would never work, but Candy and Travis agree with her. They follow her into the cereal isle. I glance at Luke and Annabeth. None of us can think of anything. Maybe if I could find a security lock for the freezer. Or I could risk my life taking to Ma and Pa again. Or I could-

"CHARGE!" Mabel screams and I dive to the side. I look up and see my sister, Travis, and Candy holding a plank of wood from a storage room, I guess, and they are charging at the glass doors. Luke tries to stop them but, _SMASH! _The glass explodes and shatters. I try avoiding the glass as I run to the freezer. I don't see or hear them, so I'm guessing Mabel's plan worked. Luke and Annabeth join me and we stick our heads into the freezer. Suddenly, I'm sucked into the freezer head first and can only hear Luke and Annabeth screaming behind me.


	14. Pink, Magical Goodness

Ever wonder what it's like to fall into an endless pit? Imagine leaving your intestines at the top. Your eyeballs being sucked out. Seriously, I saw my life flash before my eyes. The time when Connor and I robbed part of the White House when we were going to camp. Well, the White House's junkyard. Really, I'm not a criminal. The time I replaced a girl from the Aphrodite cabin's hairbrush with a squirrel was priceless. Such good memories.

Techically I was moving forwards, but it felt like a free fall. I notice Mabel screaming, but Candy is either past us or doesn't mind dying in a ditch. I flail my arms until I accidentally yank Mabel's hair. She slaps me. It's quite accurate considering the fact that it's pitch black. I grab onto her right hand and we keep falling.

After at least ten minutes, we're still falling. Huh, I wonder if my vomit will somehow stick to the walls or something. The phase of panic has disappeared, but I can tell Mabel is getting sick too.

"Travis, how long is this going to take?" Mabel asks just as we stop abruptly. There is no ground under me, just air. Now what?

We slowly lower until I place my foot on solid ground. Actually, it's not really solid, more like a marshmallow. There is light here, but no sun or anything that radiates light. But I can see. I run up to Mabel and hug her. I'm still holding her tightly until I hear, "Uh, this is awkward." I look up and see Dipper, Luke, Candy, and Annabeth staring at us.

"What? Oh... I don't like like her or anything, but if you haven't noticed, I just endured a ten minute free fall, so it's a relief I'm alive," I reply. Mabel blushes and says, "Travis was screaming more than I was." Annabeth smirks.

"So, is this the Underworld?" Dipper holds his stomach, trying not to hurl. I look around. Remember how I said it felt like landing on a marshmallow? Well, we were on something squishy and pink. Mabel sniffs the air and pulls Waddles out of her puny bag. They both lay down on the floor. Annabeth warns, "Mabel, you sure you should eat that?" Mabel takes a huge chunk out of the ground.

"Marshmallows!" Mabel screams as she runs around with Waddles, occasionally tripping and chewing the floor. I look at everyone else. Candy, Dipper, and Luke get in their knees and lick the floor. Their eyes widen and they swallow huge amount of the pink marshmallow. I think, "What the heck?" and lick it.

This was the best thing I've ever eaten. Imagine your favorite food. Then multiply its deliciousness and size by a thousand. I wish I could live here. Forever. Annabeth shouts, "You guys! Anyone listening? This might and probably will be a trap!" I ignore her and stuff myself with pink goodness. Annabeth begins to chase Waddles and Mabel around, but Mabel's pretty hyper. I continue munching and turn to Luke and Dipper. Their faces are pink and sticky like mine. Mabel suddenly stops running and falls to the ground. Dipper, Luke, and I all stand up and run over to help her, but all I remember is saying, "Smile Dip..." and falling to the mushy floor.


	15. Since When was the Underworld Pink?

For the record, I did try to stop everyone from eating the floor. I truly did. It's not my fault that my friends can be defeated by a giant pink marshmallow.

My knees ache after chasing Mabel and her pig for ten minutes, and soon everyone collapses onto the ground. Luke looks unconscious, I think Travis is going to sleep-vomit, Mabel's moaning, "Smile Dip... evil...", Candy's eyes are fluttering, and Dipper looks like he's dead. I pull out some ambrosia, but a voice stops me.

"Greek magic won't help you, Annabeth Chase," I pull out my dagger and look up. Well, down. Down at a stubby kid with hair too big for his head. "Who are you?" I step closer to my friends.

"Why, it's Lil' Ol' Me! Gideon!" I freeze. This is the psycho that tried to kill Dipper. I never thought Dipper had an enemy that was like this. He giggles like a madman and walks over to me.

"Annabeth, you may not remember me. I was the five year old that went to school with you in kindergarten. Don't you remember? You were the one that got me in trouble and forced my family to move to this wretched town!" he shouts and twitches.

Oh yeah, I remember! He was that creepy kid that cried when someone took one of 'his' crayons. Wow, looks like someone can hold a grudge. For seven years.

I raise my hand with the knife, but Gideon warns, "Oh Annabeth, don't you understand? You're not in the land of the gods. You're in the land of Gravity Falls! The only place in the world with enough weirdness to become its own beliefs. We don't have religion or gods, we have the strangest of myths, ones you can't begin to comprehend! Hades got tired of dealing with the deranged people of Gravity Falls, so he gave this part of the underworld to Dionysus, the only greek god that could handle the madness! Fortunately, he was too lazy to do anything and let the minds of the citizens here create it! So here we are. A giant marshmallow!"

This is crazy. No wonder everything is creepy here. Dionysus, Hades, marshmallows, it doesn't make any sense! I look up away from my friends, but Gideon's gone.


	16. The World's Biggest Head and Diaper

I open my eyes and see Annabeth with her hand on my forehead.

"Luke? Are you okay?" I blink and nod. When I sit up, I see everyone else circled around.

"Dude, you took ten extra minutes to wake up," Travis complains. I shrug, but I know why. Kronos has been talking to me again. He said Dipper would be best as a dead Dipper, but I'm reluctant. I mean, Dipper is someone like me. Angry at their parents, only having one person as true family. I've thought about asking Annabeth if she would ever betray her mom to create a better world, but Kronos told me to wait until she realized how terrible the gods are.

Kronos allowed me to wait until I killed Dipper because he has to realize how bad the gods are. But I feel terrible of lying to Annabeth. Candy doesn't really have anything to do with this, but she's a nice girl. And Travis, I think he has not reached the point when he realizes he could be greater without his father's selfish needs. Everyone can do better. Who cares if the gods are great? They punished Prometheus for introducing fire... They never care for their children... Thalia. When she died, I vowed to never admire the gods again. Zeus makes a promise, and she died because of it.

But there's one thing I know: Percy Jackson. Kronos said that I would have to do a great deed for him and I'd meet Percy Jackson. Then I'd kill him, and Hermes will pay for the centuries of children that died because of the gods.

I stand up and look around. The marshmallow is like a prison cell. The ceiling, walls, and floor are marshmallow. I don't think we'll be able to breathe for long.

Dipper begins to panic and begins ripping the floor apart and eating more.

"Dipper! Stop!" Annabeth yells. I know, we all nearly died eating it, but I join him and begin munching it. Annabeth tries to slap some sense into me, but I'm telling you, this stuff is amazing. Apparently it's like a drug because Travis, Candy, and Mabel stuff themselves. As Annabeth shouts at us, Travis crams some into her mouth. Right when she's about to spit it out, her eyes light up and she swallows it. We all begin digging a tunnel downwards through the floor until Mabel leans over to grab another piece and falls straight down.

We snap out of the trance and dive after her. As I'm falling down, Mabel rolls over to the side. But before I can do the same, Travis lands smack on top of me. Then Annabeth. Then Dipper. Thankfully Candy is wearing a parachute (I don't know how she has one...) But of course, Mabel shouts, "Dog pile!" And jumps on. I can't feel my breath, but we all collapse to the right and I become balanced again. I'm ready to strangle Travis when Dipper stops me.

"Luke, what is that?" he asks. I finally take a look at my surroundings. The room is pure white, yet I don't have a shadow. I don't even see the ceiling or the hole we made in the marshmallow. I'm about to tell Dipper that I have no idea when a deep voice booms, "It's me, Time Baby. Ruler of the Gravity Falls Underworld."

**OMG this is in Luke's POV! I might have him narrate the next chapter as well...**


	17. Mabel and the Pomegranate

While I'm trembling in fear along with everyone else, Candy pulls out her phone and snaps a picture. "Really?" I ask. She smiles and shows her phone to me.

"Look Luke, the floating baby's going to be internet famous!" she whispers. I roll my eyes and glance at everyone else. Dipper looks like he's in this baby's debt, Mabel is mesmerized by how it's floating, Travis looks terrified, and Annabeth is aiming her knife. She throws it, but the baby raises its hand and stops it in midair.

"I apologize, but you can't kill imagination. I'm not really here, I'm part of someone's imagination. But I might be here, since I can time travel. It's fun confusing people," he laughs. Since Annabeth's the leader, we all look at her and she turns towards the baby. "Um, how do we get out of here?" she timidly asks. "I'm not trapping you in here, my job is to welcome people who come down here. And I can answer one question. Anything you want," he announces. Annabeth closes her eyes to think and asks, "How do we cure Apollo?"

"Well, you have many answers... find King Midas, become the god of donkeys..." he answers. How is that supposed to help us? "Oh yeah, Robbie has the only potion in the world that could cure him," he nonchalantly replies. Dipper's eyes widen.

"Thank you, uh Time Baby," Annabeth bows her head. There is a door now behind the baby, and we all walk around to it.

"Don't forget, this will be more confusing than the Labyrinth. And trust me, not many have gotten out of their sane, so most of you might be driven crazy," he says.

On that happy note, we walk through the door. We continue walking in silence. Well, Mabel's singing "Want You Back."

"Whoa," I gasp when we emerge out of the tunnel. The sky is gray, the plants look pretty but dead, and people are just aimlessly wandering around us. "The Underworld. Wow. That was easy," Annabeth comments. Yeah, that _was_ easy. Too easy. I thought getting to the Underworld would have taken more time. Mabel runs over to a garden and picks a fruit off of a tree.

"Mabel, thats a pomegranate!" Annabeth yells after Mabel swallows it. Uh oh, is this like the Persephone "Eat it and you stay down here forever?" Mabel begins to become transparent like the figures walking around. This is not good. Not good at all.


	18. Hades Hates Disneyland

Everyone starts freaking out. Candy and Dipper are all sweaty, and Annabeth is looking at Luke for advice. And you'd think that brave and handsome Travis would come to her rescue, but sadly, I was more concerned about the three old ladies floating above us.

"Well, looks like another foolish child decided to eat the fruit. Sadly, it's made for gods, so you'll probably burn out before becoming trapped down here forever as Hades's servant," the one in the middle scowls as the identical two cackle. "Furies," Annabeth mumbles to herself.

A man I think is Hades appears out of nowhere. He's got a bushy beard and black clothes. Since I'm in the Christmas spirit, I could say he resembles a goth Santa.

He starts rambling, "You've eaten it?! Geez, don't you see the sign that says: Don't eat the pomegranates!? This is terrib-"

Mabel vomits up the fruit all over the ground. Ew. "I hate pomegranates! I thought these were deformed apples or something!" We all stare at here in disbelief.

"Well, I've never seen anyone vomit up sacred fruits of the Underworld," he looks at the Furies who reluctantly clean up the pink mush.

"Lord Hades, why are you in Gravity Falls's Underworld? I thought you didn't like it here," Luke comments.

"Well, I like Gravity Falls in the holidays. Halloween and Christmas go well together. I must admit, the jack-o-melons are very nice," Hades gestures to the statues of watermelons with some of the most gruesome faces I've ever seen. "Lord Hades, the Time Baby said that a guy named Robbie could help us cure Apollo. We think he may be down here," Annabeth tells the god.

"Oh, him. He came to me, thinking that I'd allow a zombie into my palace. Well I did. He's rotting away in a dungeon. Well, I think he is. Do zombies just lay in a prison forever? I'm not sure, it was never brought up by the Greeks," he casually replies. Wow, this is weird.

Annabeth gulps and timidly says, "Lord Hades, please let us find him. Apollo-"

"Yeah yeah, I know he's going to kill you. That's not my problem though. So oh well. Now I'll have to trap you all in the dungeons," he announces.

"Please Lord Hades, maybe we could do something for you! Maybe Travis could give you a foot massage?" Luke asks. I shake my head. I'd rather rot in a dungeon than rub a smelly old man's foot.

"Well, I do need an autograph from Mickey Mouse at Disneyland. Persephone's been bugging me for the past few months to take her on like a date there, but I'm no fan of happy magic or giant rodents. You can have three people go to Disneyland and get the freaking autograph," Hades tells us. Wow, just get a mouse's autograph? Piece of cake. And I've always wanted to go to Disneyland. Maybe steal some of the overly expensive merchandise there. I'm about to volunteer when Annabeth says, "Luke, Dipper, and I will go. Dipper and Mable have been there since they lived here in California, but we need boring logic today. Sorry Mable, you need rest. The pomegranate burned you out. No offense that I called you boring Dipper, it was a compliment. Believe me, people say architecture is boring."

I'm about to object Annabeth's choice, but Hades nods and snaps his fingers. Then Mabel and I grab each other as we plunge into the darkness for the second time today.

**I'm sorry for not updating, but there's been a lot of problems with my life... I have three incomplete stories, so I'll be updating one of them each week, so it might be a while until I update this one again. For all Gravity Falls and Tratie of Percy Jackson fans, you should check out my other stories! I'll be updating my Gravity Falls one next week.**


	19. I'm About to Die, I got Nothing to Lose

I land with a thud, crushing my butt. How heroic, I die with an extreme pain in my rear end. I sit up, but the ceiling is only two inches away from my head and I now have a seriously bad headache. When we fell, he decided not to take my backpack, but he grabbed Mabel's while we fell. Jerk.

"Travis?" Mabel calls in the dark. I listen and carefully crawl over to her. I stand up but then forget that Hades trapped us in a room that was meant for deceased people that can't stand up. I bang my forehead and sit back down.

"Mabel? Are you okay?" I ask her. I can't see her face, but I know she's upset. She begins to cry and say, "He took my bag. My sweaters. Waddles!" I know how that feels.

My mom died two years ago when I was eleven and Connor was having his birthday the day after. My mom and I were making Connor's birthday cake when I must've accidentally replaced something with the pufferfish venom Hermes gave to me to give to Connor for his birthday. Who sends their troublemaking son pufferfish venom? So for the year since she died, Connor and I lived in the White House's junkyard until a fat satyr came to get us last year. I didn't know where the venom came from until Hermes told me a few months ago that he sent it. I had blamed myself for something my father did. And now she's gone. I can't afford to lose Mabel.

Until now, I never realized how extraordinary she is. Her obsession over sweaters, how she cares for Dipper, how she's one of the greatest friends I ever had. I've never met anyone that could solve all problems in life with silliness. She is not perfect, but that is what's so great about her.

We both lay on our backs on the cold marble floor. Mabel is silently crying, but I say, "Mabel, it's just us. You can cry your eyeballs out." Personally, I want to cry too, but I just let Mabel sob into my shoulder. Are we really going to die here? What did Hades do with my friends?

All of a sudden a voice in my head says, _Kiss her. _What the heck? I pull out the flashlight from my backpack and turn it on. Mabel's still leaning on my right shoulder. Since Hades took all of her sweaters, she's shivering like crazy. I turn to the side and hug her. No, it's not one of those awkward lovey dovey hugs, but seriously, she's freezing to death.

_Hurry up and kiss her already! Trust me. _Trust who? This is really freaking me out. Well now that I think about it, it would be a little better to die and have Mabel with me instead of dying the usual slow, painful death.

She's still crying when I stop hugging her. I prop myself up with my right arm and rest my head on my shoulder. She just turns towards me, using my backpack as a pillow.

"Mabel, you should know... I'd rather die here with you rather than anyone else that was on this quest," I admit. She stops crying and smiles, "Really Travis?" I nod. I probably would have retorted a rude comment if this was a conversation minus the dying and Hades and that junk. But I figured that if I ever did anything like that to Mabel, I'd hurt more than her.

We just stare at each other in silence for a few minutes. I see her entire life. Really. I guess that usually happens to demigods that are trapped in the Underworld right before they die. There's one part when she's five and hammers Dipper in the butt. And she's seven when she draws a mustache on Dipper's face using glue and sparkles. I smile to myself. Wait, if I can see her life, doesn't that mean she can see mine?

"Pufferfish venom..." Mabel whispers. I start feeling tears in the corners of my eyes. If she enjoyed any parts of my life, she doesn't show it. I know she's thinking about my mom.

"Travis... about your mom," Mabel looks at me, but I turn away. "I'm fine. Let's just stop talking about that," I rebuke. "Travis, listen to me," but I look at her and threateningly say, "Stop. Just drop it."

"Travis! Listen to me! I've seen your mom before. In Gravity Falls, there's a lady named Sue. Dipper and I met her on Pioneer Day at the museum," I find that hard to believe, but I let Mabel continue, "She has long, curly, and light brown hair. Seriously, she might be your mom."

I just stare at Mabel. Could my mom really be here? If she was alive, it would make sense that she lived in the weirdest town ever. Would she remember me if I ever saw her again?

"Travis, are you alr-" I wrap my arms around her neck and plant my lips onto hers.

Wow. My first and probably last kiss, but it is the best kiss EVER. I don't think that I could ever tell anyone what it was exactly like, but I loved it. It was nice and sweet.

"Mabel? I really like you," I say once we pull apart.

"Travis," she breathes, "When was the last time you brushed your teeth?"

I just stare at her, but she smiles. "I was kidding!" she laughs, and although we're about to die, I laugh with her.

Just then, the ground disappears. Mabel screams and grabs my arm. The room is starting to brighten and the ceiling has vanished. But we aren't falling, only floating.

"Travis?" a voice calls from who knows where. "It's me," the voice says. The person that talked into my head?

"No, that's just a friend of mine that helped me with a favor," I look up and Mabel gasps. It's exactly like she described: long and light brown hair. Soft eyes. It couldn't be.

Mom.

**Anyone remember Sue from the episode with Quentin Trembley? I totally thought she was an important character, and now even this is blowing my mind. And Travis and Mabel kissed! Sure, it might seem rushed, but remember, they were about to die. Personally, I think Mabel and Travis are nice together... She's the reason he begins to come up with weird pranks! And for everyone waiting for Percy, he's coming. Well, not anytime soon. Just thought you'd like to hear that.**


	20. The Most Terrifying Place on Earth

"Mabel!" Dipper yells as Hades allows Travis and Mabel to fall through the ground. I just tried to reason with the god of death, and now two of my friends are probably dead. Just great.

"No, they're not dead. But they will be if you don't hurry up," Haded stomps his foot.

My head begins to ache and I feel the marshmallow coming up. Luke and Dipper are both groaning in pain, but my legs are too numb to move.

When my vision clears, I see a group of scared people staring at us three. They scurry off to a row of at least twenty gates. I look at the floor. Tiles are covering the ground with names of people and a cute symbol of a castle. When I finally look up, Dipper and Luke are also recovering.

"Disneyland. We're here," Dipper comments.

"Okay, now how do we get in?" I question.

Luke grins. "Leave that to me," he smirks before he sneaks into an employee room. He comes out seconds later with three shiny slips.

"Luke, we can't steal," I tell him. "I didn't steal these, I simply borrowed some annual passes. Don't worry, I paid with some drachma," he tries to come up with an excuse. Dipper's panicking about how stealing is bad and doesn't get you anywhere except prison.

Once we squirm through the crowds and finally pass under the train station in the front, I'm lost. People are zooming past us, looking for the nearest ride, restroom, or restaurant. Dipper's been here before, so he leads us down Main Street and to the statue of Walt Disney and Mickey in front of a giant castle.

"If he wants an autograph from Mickey, we better find the character. Then maybe we could check out some rides," Luke suggests. I know, it's a quest so we have to concentrate and focus, but I've also always wanted to go to Disneyland. Maybe check out the castle and the architectural stylings.

It wasn't hard to find Mickey. The hard part was the giant crowd around him. Every time I tried moving forward, an angry mother shoved me back. This was hopeless.

Soon the employee assisting the dude in the Mickey suit said that they had to leave, so I put on my invisibility cap and followed them backstage. Dipper and Luke didn't follow me, but they saw me disappear. They're probably just checking out the map they got at the entrance.

I scan the area: a group of people are sitting around a table. They're wearing half of their suits, but their heads are off. Mickey actually looks pretty good, besides the fact that he's sweating from being zipped up for a long time. Minnie, Goofy, and Daisy are also there. I wonder how I'm gonna get Mickey's signature... this is harder than I thought.

I pull off my hat and walk towards the employees.

"Uh, hi... could you just forge Mickey's signature for me?" I timidly ask. Even being a daughter of Athena, I don't really have a plan to where this is going.

Then I recognize Mickey. It's Mike Bell, from the Hermes cabin. His mom was actually a siren (I don't know how THAT happened) but soon everyone found out and he was made an outcast. Avoided, since his mother was a monster. Luke was always respected from the moment he helped me cross into camp the day Thalia died. He always welcomed new campers, and I loved how he treated everyone equally, even a shy son of a siren. I'm ashamed, I never really talked to people that were lonely. I recall him running away from camp three years ago once Luke left for his quest and no one was there to defend him.

Mike looks at me and raises an eyebrow. "Sorry, you're not supposed to be back here. How did you get past all of the other workers?" He excuses himself from his friends and stands up. Mike gestures me to walk away, and we begin to talk around the corner of a building.

"Mike... I'm Annabeth. You were at Camp Half Blood a few years ago..." I stutter.

He narrows his eyes. "Oh yeah, that wretched place where I was threatened by random people that because my mom was a siren, they would have to kill me," he growls.

"Well, I've always thought that you were lucky to at least befriend Luke. He's outside right now, waiting for me to come out with a signature of Mickey Mouse," I reply.

"Luke... I remember him. He was basically the only one to talk to me. No one wanted to sit next to me, fight me, have anything to do with me. Fine. What's it for?" Wow, I'm surprised he agreed.

"Well, Hades sent Luke, our friend, and me to get an autograph of Mickey to give to his wife," I try to make it sound as realistic as possible.

"Fine, but only if you do me one favor. Shove Clarrise La Rue's head into a pile of horse dung. She did that to me once... I hate her. And as you can see, I don't have any demigod scent which means I don't attract monsters," I nod and hand him a pen and paper. He scribbles out the autograph and hands it to me.

As I turn to leave, I say, "Maybe you could come back with us. People will respect you. I guarantee it."

He shakes his head. "I belong here. Sorry," he returns to his friends.

I put my cap back on and exit through the doors.

I run back over to the statue in front of the castle. But Dipper and Luke aren't there. I look around; no sign of them whatsoever.

I hear people screaming on the giant mountain in front of me (the Matterhorn, I think), I see a marching band playing songs, but I don't see my friends. Where could they possibly be? I place my hand over my knife and run to the place I can tract down Dipper and Luke: the place with proper height and a connection to the gods. The large, beautiful, and magnificently built castle. If Olympus was at Disneyland, the castle would be the Empire State Building. Hades was smart to put his palace under the "happiest place on earth." Personally, New York is home, but California would be a close second.

Wait. I'm getting off track. I head under the archway of the castle and close my eyes. I don't have any drachma, so the best attempt would be praying to Harmonia. Maybe she's in a good mood today... I hope.


	21. I Hate Snakes as Much as Spiders Now

**Annabeth**

"Come on... Come on!" I yell at myself under the castle. I feel people's eyes laying on me, but I continue to concentrate. Think happy thoughts, so you don't get destroyed by Eris... Meeting Luke, winning capture the flag, Dipper and Mabel, even Travis, everyone at Camp Half Blood...

A glowing light shines above my head. Before I can act casual and tell tourists that this happens everyday at Disneyland, I drop through the floor.

"It's about time," Harmonia comments as she walks towards me. The large room looks dark, like the Underworld, but also cheerful, like a celebration.

"Lady Harmonia, how do I help my friends? Luke and Dipper disappeared. I don't know if Travis and Mabel are still alive!" I try to calm down.

Harmonia still looks like how she did in the limo. She gracefully picks up a wilting flower by her feet. "Well, I can confirm that they are all alive. Unfortunatley, Dipper and Luke are having some... difficulties right now. Here, take this," Harmonia hands me a slip of paper.

The top says, "Indiana Jones Fastpass." I glance up at the goddess.

"Be grateful I gave you this. If not, you would've been stuck in a line for at least an hour! Now hurry up before Mara kills your friends," Harmonia snaps her fingers and I feel myself float back up.

I startle a few tourists when I pop out of the ground. I pull out the park map from my pocket (always be prepared) and dash towards Adventureland.

I trip of a mob of strollers and swerve through the crowds, but I eventually end up in front of the ride. I see an extremely long line, but I hand the cast member my Fastpass. I just saved an hour of my life!

As I enter the entrance of the Temple of Doom, I see fake snakes, old looking rocks, and spikes in the ceiling. Hopefully those are just for presentation. After a few more minutes, I'm nearly in the front of the line.

"One person," I tell the guy assigning the seats. He nods, "Row two." I get behind the bamboo gates and look at the people boarding in front of us. Another jeep comes, and I step all the way to the left side. A family of parents and their eight year old daughter are in the same row as me.

As a child, I always wanted to go to Disneyland. I never got to see any princesses when I was little. My stepmom took her sons and my father. But not me, since I was always causing _trouble_ for her precious boys. I had to stay at home with my evil nanny, Tia Callida. My spoiled classmates in kindergarten would brag about the toys and treats they always got at Disneyland. Naturally, I would be excited to go on the ride. But right now, my friends are in trouble.

A voice comes through the speaker, "My friends, the brakes may be needing a little adjustment – easy on the curves," after the employees check the seat belts.

The jeep swerves to the right and we're facing the three doors at the Camber of Destiny. The face in the middle glows, "You seek the treasure of Mara. Glittering gold. It is yours."

The vehicle rushes foward to a hall filled with "treasure." Wait, did I just see a golden drachma? Being the cautious girl I am, I don't take any chances by staring at the forbidden eye. I shield my eyes and look to thr side. I know, that's just a superstition... It's not to me. I'm a freaky demigod, so I know something's going to go wrong.

"Mommy, that girl is too scared to look up," the eight year old girl glances at me. Her mother just laughs silently and looks up.

"Foolish mortals! You looked into my eyes. Your path now leads to the Gates of Doom! Bwahahahahahahahaha!" Mara's voice booms. The mom shrieks, and suddenly, there's a skeleton next to me. Two people in the front were also vaporized. I'm too scared to look behind me. The girl screams and shows her father his skeleton wife. The dad faints in his seat. I can't help feeling bad for her. A skeletal mom and an unconscious dad.

The jeep turns to the left. Indiana Jones is trying to keep the gates closed. Instead of telling us to hurry up, he calls, "Annabeth! They're in the Snake Temple!"

The other remaining guests are panicking so much that they don't really listen to his warning. But I understand. I toss him a drachma, which he catches with ease. He winks, and then the vehicle passes to the left.

Music begins to play as we enter the main part of the ride. A rock version of Mara's face is in the center. I try to tell myself that the room of skeletons was fake. It wasn't that convincing.

Then came the bugs. Creepy, crawly SPIDERS! I screamed and gripped the mother's skeleton's hand. I felt some crawl up my leg. What the heck! This isn't supposed to be real. I tried to kill them all. Thankfully, we were only with the bugs for a few seconds.

There was an unstable bridge in front of us. With my luck, it would break. Don't the crew members notice when their guests are killed by a ride? The jeep stops in the middle, but we make it over safely. Then we enter... the Snake Temple. The remaining tourists are still screaming, so they don't really care that there are two boys tied together in front of a giant snake. I slice my seatbelt in half with my knife and dive out of the vehicle.

I safely roll over and watch the jeep dive down to the right. I cross the track and me each my friends. I remove their gags and untie them.

"Annabeth! We have to go fast!" Dipper and Luke dash in the same direction that the car was going. I don't question them as we attempt to get away from whatever is trying to catch us.

HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! I quickly glance back and stare at the giant cobra. I thought these were automatons! Hepheastus probably created them. How else could Disneyland be so real? Dipper is panting, and Luke stays behind us to make sure we're safe. We run through the hall of spearing skeletons. One spear nearly stabs me in the shoulder, but we make it through in five seconds. The snake is still gaining on us, dissolving parts of the track with venom.

The three of us stop and see Indiana Jones hanging on a rope above us. Oh gods, this is the boulder. And I'm pretty sure that the boulder will crush us. "Hurry up!" Jones yells. The "boulder" begins to roll forward.

I turn to my friends and they shrug. We run down the steep slope as fast as we can. I hear the snake hiss and the boulder fall. Could it be...

Dipper crawls around the corner. "You guys, check this out," he pants. I trudge with Luke and stare. Indiana Jones is standing there along with the boulder and a... bunch of snake guts and skin underneath it. Ew.

"Not bad, children of the Olympians. Thanks for taking care of Nagini Sr. Did you know that Voldemort was going to make a comeback?" Indiana Jones casually speaks. When did Harry Potter, Indiana Jones, and Greek gods become involved with one another? "And Dipper, your mom is very proud of you for following the path. Hades is calling me," he states. Before I can ask him anything, his head drops and I see a white figure disappear into the ground.

"Not bad, for tourists!" the robot speaks, just like the ride is supposed to do.

I look at Dipper. "Explanations?" I ask him. Dipper wipes some sweat off of his forehead and stutters, "I have no idea what just happened."

Luke speaks up, "Well I do. That _was _Indiana Jones. Hades knew we'd have trouble, so he sent Jones' soul to guide us. But I doubt that. Maybe Persephone or a nicer god. Dipper, was he talking about Aphrodite?"

**Dipper**

****_Don't say anything about me..._ Artemis warns. I gulp, "I guess."

Annabeth raises an eyebrow, "And what about the path thing?"

"Well... someone spoke in my mind, telling me to come here. The cast member let Luke and me cut through the exit. I swear it sounded just like Indiana Jones. I feel bad now because we didn't get anything from this traumatizing experience," I admit.

Annabeth looks like she's about to strangle me but Luke stops her, "Wait a second, I remember what happened when we were tied up. There was a secret engraving on the wall. It said, _Harmony is found where futures await. Go beyond the sky and find the hidden rodent."_

__I pause for a second, "Luke's right! It was by the snake! But what does it mean?" Harmonia is waiting... Future... Tomorrowland!

"You guys, Tomorrowland! Go beyond the sky... a space ride. Hidden Mickey!" I shout.

"Hidden Mickey?" Annabeth asks.

"At Disneyland, a lot of rides have a Mickey Mouse head or shape on the ride. I bet that's what we have to do to save Mabel and Travis!" I regain all of my energy.

Luke brushes dust of his pants. "Okay, better get going before they shut down the park because of the malfunctioning ride. I hope the mortals made it off safely."


	22. Disney Food is so Freaking Expensive

**Candy**

Hello friends! It's Candy. You've probably been wondering where I have been, but I assure you, I am in big trouble. Mabel and Travis fell through the ground, and Annabeth, Luke, and Dipper disappeared.

"Candy, your mother has requested me to not kill you. Come," Hades says.

"Persephone? What does she want?" I question.

"Just come. Now!"

"Yes, Father," I skip after him and into the palace. Oh, you didn't know? I'm the goddess of candy. Yeah, I have no idea how death and flowers make candy. I like staying out of the Greek myths, so I just hang out at Gravity Falls. My disguise is Candy Chiu. I wish I was her, not some freak his her father's greasy hair and mother's dead spirit.

My father is still holding Waddles in his arms. It looks quite cute. I pull out my phone and take a picture. "Candy, phones are prohibited," he warns. I ignore him and check out my other pictures: the Summerween Trickster, the Goblewonker, and some other memories from hundreds of years ago.

"Dad, isn't Demeter visiting today?" I ask.

"Sadly, yes. Be a good granddaughter. Not like last time," he glares.

"Oh yeah! It's not my fault that some of Ceberus' dog waste somehow smuggled into her dinner," I defend myself. The funny part is that Demeter punished Hades instead of me.

She was all like, "If my sweet granddaughter lived with her mother and grandmother in the sun with flowers and cereal, she would be the perfect child. But no! She's got to put up with her father as well! And you send her to Gravity Falls? The cereal there is terrible!" It was hilarious.

We walk through the doors and see my mother doing yoga in the throne room. "Mom!" I call as I run over and tackle her.

"Candy, you're a goddess, not a football player," Hades swiftly comes over and pulls me up.

"Hades, she would be a godess, but she's now a resident of Gravity Falls, so we can't change the fact that she could play for the New York Knicks," my mother says.

"Honey, that's a basketball team. I hate modern sports. What this country needs is a real Olympic Games, not some volleyball tournaments. The more blood the better," Hades magically removes his jacket.

Persephone ignores him and continues to practice yoga. "My mother's coming to do her palace inspection, so tidy up the realm," she orders my father.

Hades curses in Ancient Greek and slouches in his throne. "If I was Zeus, I'd have servant to do everything without hesitation. My wife wouldn't have a nagging and obnoxious mother," he complains.

"Obnoxious? Well, at least I don't kidnap my spouse!" Demeters poofs in, grain falling on the floor.

Persephone gets up from downward dog. "Mother! It's been a few months since I saw you!"

Demeter scowls at Hades, "I see you haven't made the palace suitable for a family to live in. Candy! How's my granddaughter? I haven't seen you in a few decades! I don't understand why your father would send you to Gravity Falls... That town corrupts one innocent soul after another."

"Grandma, I am okay," I assure her.

"Did your father tell you to call me Grandma? It makes me feel old," she glares at him.

Hades mumbles, "Well, you are old."

They both stare at each other for a while. Then, they both burst into insults.

"At least I didn't kidnap your daughter!"

"It's not my fault Persephone likes pomegranates!"

"Hades, you always complain about how Zeus gets everything he wants, so I guess taking my daughter helps even it out!"

"Your daughter isn't as valuable as being the king of the gods!" my dad yells.

As they keep on yelling, they are gradually getting taller. Soon, Hades' forehead is touching the chandelier in the ceiling. Just as they're about to destroy each other, my mom stops them. "My daughter is behaving better than my mother and husband!"

She grabs my hand and pulls me into my room.

Even though I'm an immortal goddess, that doesn't mean that I'm ancient news. I mean, no one knows anything about me, since I live in Gravity Falls. Although I didn't create candy, that doesn't mean that I'm not the supreme overlord of it. Well, except for bad, tasteless candy. That's out of my control.

I sit down next to my mother on my floral patterned bed. She hands me Mabel's backpack, and Waddles plops down next to me. "Honey, you're a sweet child, but I think it's best that you stay in here as I sort out this family feud," I nod and take out my phone. Being a goddess, it's not that hard to find reception underground.

"One new message," the phone reads. It's an unknown number.

_Candy, this is Dipper. When he sent us to Disneyland, he only trapped Mabel and Travis. Where are you?_

Uh oh. My father's number one rule: no talking to boys. Well, it's not like he used to have tons of children... that's strange. I reply instantly.

_Dipper, Hades wanted to talk to me about Gravity Falls, since I've lived there the longest. I'm fine, and he's promised to not kill Travis and Mabel if you get the autograph._

I wait for a minute and he texts back.

_We got the signature, but we don't know how to get back. We're in line for Star Tours right now._

_What?! You shouldn't be going on any rides._

_I know, but we found a clue written in ancient Greek. Just see if you can ask Hades how he's going to let us into the Underworld._

_Okay, just don't die._

I put down my phone and pat Waddles on the head.

When I poke my head back into the throne room, Demeter is gone. Persephone is too, so my father is just mumbling to himself, "I hate cereal."

"Uh, Father? Are Mabel and Travis still alive?" I scoot into the room.

He grunts, "I think so, but not for long. The other three freaks haven't come back."

"Well, did you open up the entrance to the Underworld at Disneyland?"

Hades pauses for a moment, "Whoops. Oh well, they'll have to find a way themselves." He goes back to hating his mother-in-law.

There's no point in arguing, so I guess I have to go find them.

_Dipper, the monsters are going to find you if you keep using your phone, but I'll meet you by the Churro cart right outside Star Tours._

_Ok. So far, we've only been nearly killed on Indiana Jones._

I sneak into the library and find aisle 32. I tilt the book with the Hidden Mickey and jump into the magical hole that appeared in the wall.

I look around: crowds are swarming, babies are crying, teenagers are screaming... Ouch! A wheelchair just ran over my left foot!

I snap my fingers and look at the map that appeared in my fist. Wait, I'm a goddess! I don't need maps!

Two seconds later, I'm outside Star Tours. I don't see Dipper, Annabeth, or Luke, but I casually walk over to the Churro cart.

"One churro please," I tell the vendor.

"That'll be $3.75."

WHAT?! Since when did a stick of dough and sugar cost that much? But since Demeter's going to make me eat cereal for lunch, I hand the guy my money.

As I eat my churro, I completely forget about my friends.

I know I should keep looking for them, but my mind doesn't want to. My legs Cary me away from our meeting place. Wait, I'm immortal, why is a piece of cinnamon controlling me? I can't move my legs, I can't change into a rat. This is bad.


	23. I Barf up Robert Pattinson (JK)

**For all of my loyal readers that wanted to know what happens to Travis and Mabel, here it is! Candy, Luke, Dipper, and Annabeth are going to have to wait. Oh well. **

**Mabel**

Travis wasn't good at describing that kiss. Seriously, he called it nice and sweet. For one thing, his breath smelled like some rotten type of meat. But I shouldn't say that, considering I recently vomited a pomegranate.

"Travis, I'm okay," Sue says as she walks towards us. Travis sits up and rubs his eyes. "Aw, don't cry," his mom kneels next to him.

"I'm not crying... It's just that after all these years, when I felt so guilty, I promised to never prank again. And now you're here, talking to me... Wait, are we dead?" Travis looks at me with red eyes.

"You two aren't dead, and neither am I."

I speak up, "So, you were poisoned, but came back to life?"

Sue giggles, "Mabel, you are such a lovely girl. No wonder Travis fancies you. And yes, once I died, Hermes met me in the Underworld. He said that Hades would be willing to let me come back up if I lived in Gravity Falls. Mabel, you and your brother understand how everyone is strange in Gravity Falls. Well, a lot of them did die. In fact, Quentin Trembley died numerous times, but his silly plans for the world drive Hades crazy, so he trapped him in a block of peanut brittle. But we are never allowed to contact anyone in our past life; we must move on, and Travis, I never spent a single day not thinking of you and Connor. Hermes gave me a mirror to check up on you two, but whenever I tried to dial the camp's phone number, the phone I was using exploded."

Travis just stares into space. His eyebrows bunch up like a hairy caterpillar. Then, he explodes.

"HERMES KILLED YOU! AND THEN HE JUST LET'S YOU COME BACK TO LIFE SO ONLY HE CAN VISIT YOU! FU-"

"Calm down Travis!" I grab his head and pet it, as if he was Waddles.

Travis glares at me like... how Robbie did when he found out that Dipper had hacked his computer. It's scary.

I feel my eyes start to tear up. Travis's scary face disappears, and his eyes bulge like a beach ball.

"Mabel, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you," he unclenches his fist, and a note falls from his hand.

"Whoa! Since when were you a magician?" I pick up the note.

Travis looks at his hand, "I didn't have a piece of paper in my hand."

I unfold the note and reply, "Well, it just poofed into your hand, so you must also be a wizard! Omigosh, you're half god, half human, and half wizard! That makes you a wizmod! You know, since it's the beginning of wizard, the m in human, and the od in god! Travis, why are random people writing letters to you in Antarctican?"

I take a deep breath, not realizing how much I talked without breathing. Travis laughs, "What's Antarctican?"

"You know, the language the polar bears speak."

"Polar bears live in the Arctic."

"You're right... Antarctican is what the half ants, half doves, half moose, and half koalas speak."

"Uh, ok," Travis stops speaking. I smile, knowing I won the argument.

Sue glances at the letter. "Mabel, this is written in Greek."

I scoff, "No it's not! I'm fluent in Antarctican. Here, I'll translate it:

Dear Hairball,

You have eaten a leg of bricks and will be dying after these short messages. My horse will poop to your monkey's yacht and steal your pants. Welcome narf and have a safe trip.

Fry Olives,

Jiggle"

I bow and wait for the applause.

"Mabel, I'm pretty sure that's not what's on the paper," Travis takes it.

"Dear Travis,

I know you're upset, and I am to blame. It's my fault that she died, and the best I could do was bring her back, even if Sue had to live in that creepy town of Gravity Falls. I swear on the River Styx that I will make it up to you.

Love,

Hermes"

Travis falters at the end.

He looks up at nowhere, "Dad... I know you're sorry. But what about Luke? And Maya? And Connor? And Charlie? And all of your other kids?"

No answer. Travis stops talking and puts his flashlight back in his backpack. "Can we leave now? My friends need me."

Sue frowns, "Although this is better than a dungeon, we're still in the Underworld, under Hades' power. You'll have to wait for your friends to return."

I sigh and sit down in midair. Sue continues, "Mabel, you always have a plan. How are you going to get out?"

How am I going to escape? I miss Waddles. And we ate pizza one time. And he barfed...

"THAT'S IT! Travis, barf some of the magic cotton-candy," I order.

"What? Why?" he picks at his fingernail.

"Trust me!" I gut him in the stomach. He doubles over, and hurls.

As he wipes his mouth, he yells, "What was that for? Connor's never going to stop bugging me if he finds out that I got punched by a girl!"

I ignore him and pray to the one god Dipper always rambles on about: Telesphorus. He symbolizes recovery from illness. Now, if I just say the right phrase...

"Telesphorus, Travis has vomited the sacred land of the marshmallows. Please come here to kill him!" I shout.

"What?!" Travis panics.

I shut my eyes as a glowing figure appears in front of me. "Mabel, my old friend!" Edward greets me.

Edward is one of Telesporus's immortal servants that lives in Gravity Falls. I caught him talking to the god in a junkyard, so he owed me a favor for making the god happy with my Mabel charm. He helped me with my Smile Dip addiction. And if you're wondering what he looks like, Edward Cullen is based off of him. Seriously.

Travis gapes at the god's servant. "Why do you know Robert Pattinson?"

Edward laughs and pats his head, "Silly boy, I ate Robert Pattinson! He's in Gravity Falls right now." Travis gives him a weird look. "Mabel, why are you three in this white expance of nothing?"

"Exactly! We need you to get us out," I explain.

Edward flinches, "Really?" he squeaks.

"Dude, you're an immortal! Get us out!" Travis complains.

Edward glares at him, "Boy, I could snap my fingers and make you vomit your intestines."

Travis scoffs, "Fine? Why don't you then?"

"Travis! Don't test his temper!" I calm him down.

Edward dramatically stares into the distance. "I. Am. Awesome."

I reply, "Of course you are. Now, how about that favor?"

He sounds just like a teenage girl, "Fiiiiiiinnnnneeeee. Hades is going to be super mad, but a deal's a deal."

**That was a long chapter. I was going to stop it after Edward shows up, but it was hard for me to stop. Anyways, I hoped you enjoyed Mabel's interpretation of Antarctican!**


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